A continued journey

After two full days of conference, I am going to bed now, my heart is so full, that I do feel like crying, I feel God's love swelling inside me and asking me for more, but not more than I have to give, just a little bit more each day. 

I pray to be even closer and this is not easy, but it is right. The last two days of spiritual uplift renewed my faith. I started with a prayer in my heart and ended knowing what I have to do. Now, I have a choice, to keep feasting on these words and not become complacent about it, or just stay the way I am. 

The Prophet of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Thomas S. Monson, said, "choices determine our destiny." 

It was said, "We need to read the scriptures, pray, and ask for answers, as if it IS the first time." I seem to have never completed this task in the first place, never fully reading, or studying ALL the scriptures, cover to cover. I get the feeling that I need to re-build, re-store what I have read and continue to study and read what I haven't. This is daunting and scary, delightful and wonderful all at the same time. 

Can I give more? What will He ask of me? What will I do? Will I fail thee? 

This is scary because change is hard and giving something up for another thing is never easy, even just allowing the time for something new is hard, but it is also delightful and wonderful because I know I will become closer to Him.

I know, I always share too much here, but I share with my heart, and this is me, and I am not ashamed. I feel prompted to keep my words in print, these our my days. I will reflect back on them, and maybe my children and their children too, maybe it will help and strengthen them and let them know we are all on a journey to get back home. 

I received an email from my dad, just before I started writing this. He wrote, "...you are always willing to share who you are, and what you have with others. I wish everyone was so open." 

I felt encouraged by this statement to share this...

My father has followed Christ his whole life and been an example of that to me, not perfect but always striving. When I hug my father I think of the glorious reunion I will have with my Heavenly Father, and as he hugs me, 

I hope...and pray, 

that He will say, ...

"Well done, my good and faithful servant, well done." 

I know that Heavenly Father loves me, but I don't think I have done ALL that I can, to show Him how much I love Him. 

I feel like I'm always starting and re-starting. I feel I am always on this journey of searching, seeking and learning. I have come to think it will forever be this way,  that this, IS what's drawing me closer to Him, and He is challenging me to do more...to refine me. 

So cheers {!} to continuing to learn, and praying and hoping that I will never give up. 

from me to you w love, M