What matters most

It is early, I just dropped of Jo for seminary.

My son wore his scout pants to school today. 

Why? 

Cause it doesn't matter. 

                     ********************

I asked don't you have jeans clean? 

Yes. 

Then why don't you wear them? 

These are fine mom. It really doesn't matter. 

I absolutely love this about him. He truly doesn't care about the things of the world that so many people are caught up in. 

He is a good son. Being a teenager is hard and I am just now seeing the angst come out and it's hard for me. He has been my Little man for so long. It was like he was the age of ten for 5 years!! Including wearing the size 10 for about that long...then poof, size 12, 14, 16. And all the sudden he became16 and a teenager. Seems crazy strange to me. 

I love him so much, like crazy glue, and it's going to be extremely hard to see him leave in just a few years, college, moving away and starting his own life in the Big world. 

I know the world is full of struggle and strife and being a teenager is hard, being anyone is hard, but I wish that the tug of war of becoming who they want to be and what we want them to be wasn't so hard. The coming of age thing, I'm my own person now, when once I held you in my arms, took care of your every need. It's hard when they pull away, becoming their own, it's a fact of life the beginning of adulthood. 

I remind myself that they, my children, are  all good, kind and loving. And that their struggle is theirs and they are learning how to react, respond & cope. I can't take this struggle away from them. They will need it to be strengthened. At this point all I can do is love and provide support. I can't take personally their choices. They are theirs & they must own them. 

There was a great quote about how your children will remember what you taught them and they will recognize the truth of things even as they grow apart and will want to cleave unto the things they knew as they remember them to be true. This is my everyday prayer. 

Life is such a journey. That is what it is. Uniquely yours, but there is a purpose and we need to remember what that is. Well, I think IT is to return to our Heavenly Father with the story of our journey that we did our best to follow the example of Christ. 

If we can keep that perspective and turn to God for guidance, we can not go wrong in happiness. 

I love you, my Not so Little anymore, Jo. And all my Littles. May you know and love God. 

From me to you w love, M  

Mommer