My Mister will always be by my side.

I am glad I have him.
After cleaning toilets, washing dishes, doing laundry and taking care of Littles,
I was in need of a little me and him time.

I texted him, How about dinner?

Thursday? What's the occasion?

I text back, Nothing. I just really needed Friday to come early.

Anyway, I was telling him how hard it is knowing I'm done with the season of babies. It is usually this time, I'd think of having another. Em is getting ready for kindergarten and my house will be empty for a few hours a day and it is usually then I have a new baby to dot over.

I have been preparing myself and preparing myself for this, but man, the struggle is here.
I'm trying to figure out what I am going to do, not just when she is in Kinder, but in Elementary and Higher. And when Jo will be gone to serve or college and Gigi, oh don't even want to think about all that, but it will be here closer than I know, and just like my Bigs, I will see them less and less and well it's just a little sad.

I am trying to raise them to be Little, but grow strong and I think I forgot a little about my own strength. I mean over the last few years with my Littlest, I have been able to be more creative and explore the freedom of complete motherhood without work, but I identify myself with being a mom, in the moment so much, that I am not quite sure what I am going to do when I am no longer needed in that capacity anymore. 

I'm just trying to live in the now, but them I found this picture,

Em was just  a year and a half and a ton of emotions came swirling in. 

My dear Littlest Little, my last one,

I wish this moment, could repeat, not to start all over again, but just to say,
"baby, we're going to love every bit of our tomorrows,"
and breathe your baby scent one more time. 

I love you, your Mommer forever.

And so, here I am finding my way all over again.
I keep thinking I'll  have my Mister always,
and I am so glad he is my forever companion,
but other than our date nights we are rarely alone.
My Littles are constant and I can not imagine the day my Littlest one will leave.
It's already hard enough that two are gone.  waaaaa

So, to all you young Mommers out there...

these moments with them,
are fewer than the moments you will be without them.
Love hard!

AND don't just love those Littles, love your Mister{!} cause when they leave the nest,
he'll be the only one right by your side, part of your every daily while they find theirs.

Man oh man, life is so full. Full of changes, and has a way of circling around again...
and in that circle, a bonus....grandLittles!!!
I can't wait to breathe that sweet breathe of air again.
I try to be patient, but I totally get it now, what the the
hounding is all about. {hehe No pressure Bigs!}

Love hard {!} love Hard!! 

from me to you with love, 

M